What's Your Beef?: Introduction to My Gnarly Love for Burgers


Way back forever ago, I talked about starting a series called "What's Your Beef?" You see, I like burgers. Like, I like-like burgers. If I could, I'd write them little notes with a "check yes or no if you like me back" and hope that they wouldn't make their own box labeled "as a friend." (Not that this has happened to me in real life with real people. Hah.) Anyway, one of my favorite hobbies is investigating the world of awesome, meaty sandwiches and I figured I might as well document it. After seeing Heather's increeeeedible BurgerQuest series (no, seriously, check it. I read all of them the first time I stumbled it. And she was actually wonderful enough to let me guest post. So...yes.) I thought out my own method for searching and scoring the things I like-like the most. Thus, here are my categories and the things I strive for in both a burger place and their star.
Rating system:
bun. - Chewy? Crusty? Moldy? My IDEAL bun is of the pretzel variety, but since that never really comes around I usually stick to a hefty but chewy bun. Maybe a bit of a crunch. I can be persuaded.

meat-ness. - Honestly, the actual burger of a burger takes backseat when I'm driving, but I still like my beef (or chicken, or pork, ...or, hell, tofu, I don't care really) to be...good. You know. (That being said, I also love places that offer veg and vegan options for all my friends.)

toppings. - Now, here's where it gets interesting. I like a lot of different things on burgers, but mostly I like how they work together. Also you need to offer caramelized onions as a topping or you are not a true burger establishment.

sauce. - This is where it gets real important. I don't like my burgers without sauce. Doesn't have to be super crazy or anything, but sauce is what brings this lovely burger together. And the hint here is: home-made barbeque.

uniqueness. - I don't usually go that out of the box when building my own burger, so I like when joints do the thinking for me! Examples: eggplant as a topping, diced chicken instead of an actual burger, and bacon cooked in pancake batter. You really can have it all.

overall gnarliness. - Not to sound like a twenty year old ripped surfer dude, but I usually describe a good burger as "gnarly." They sort of attack the plate, attack your mouth, leave you gasping for air and all...basically like that crazy push of a wave I rode this morning, man. tubular.

So, there you have it. If you have suggestions for places in/around Boston, PLEASE let me know, since I'll be starting posts ASAP. Until then...stay hungry.


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